The Journal, Part 3
Author: Amy

Taylor approached his father with tremendous trepidation. His heart was beating so fast and hard he thought everyone could probably see it pounding under his shirt. This only added to his nearly unbearable embarrassment. His father nodded toward the couch behind him where his backpack had been placed. Knowing what was expected, Tay simply reached in it and pulled out the journal. Closing his eyes tight, he took in a deep breath, held it for a few seconds, and then blew it out slowly. This helped calm his nerves a bit. Then, pressing the journal to his chest with both hands, he turned to face Scott.

Scott had moved toward them with a very confused expression on his face. When he saw the journal in Tay’s hands his eyes widened and his jaw dropped. Tay held it out to him – presenting it like an offering. “Scott, I’m the one who took your journal,” Tay said, his voice quaking. There was a stunned silence throughout the room. “I… I don’t believe it. You, Tay?” Scott stammered. Tay was the last person he’d suspected. “Why?”

Tay chewed his lip nervously, then swallowed hard and began to try and explain. “You had been teasing me about my journal that one day and I got really pissed at you. So when I saw your journal lying around later, I just took it. I didn’t really think about it. I just did it. It was stupid and wrong, I know that, but I wasn’t thinking. I… I’m really sorry Scott. I really am.” Tay was fighting hard not to dissolve into tears. He didn’t know what was worse – the extreme humiliation of the moment or the deep shame he felt at disappointing everyone so badly. Especially his parents.

Scott stood there staring at Tay in total bewilderment. “Why didn’t you just tell me when I asked you about it a few days later? Why did you wait ‘til now?” Scott asked, hurt but beginning to understand. Tay really didn’t want to go into that in front of everyone, but when he hesitated, his father cleared his throat in a way that told him, in no uncertain terms, that he was to answer the question.

He took a deep breath. “I got into some trouble a couple days after that – bad trouble – like, the … the worst trouble of my life – and got punished hard for it,” he said in a voice quavering with suppressed emotion. “So when you asked me about it I just knew I couldn’t afford to get into any more trouble so soon. I…I just couldn’t. I couldn’t … handle it. So I just lied.” Tay stopped, hoping with all his might that that would be a sufficient explanation and he wouldn’t have to tell everyone exactly what he meant by the “worst trouble of my life.” It was too humiliating. Scott nodded, but then he asked, “So what changed? Why are you telling me now?”

It was becoming obvious to Tay that he was going to have to reveal every embarrassing detail. This was just getting worse and worse. He took another deep breath and continued shakily. “After you guys left the rehearsal hall today, we were finishing some homework. I asked my mom to get a book I needed out of my backpack, not even remembering I’d put your journal in there. And … she found it.” Tay hoped this would be a satisfactory response. He closed his eyes and prayed his father wouldn’t make him say what his mother had done to him, but it was not to be. His father shifted a bit and threw Tay a look notifying him that he was to finish the story. Tay looked down and studied the floor for a moment, trying to gather the strength to go on. He sighed and added, “So she took my pants down, put me over her knee and gave me a really hard spanking.” He shuddered at the gasp emitted from the gathered group.

Scott was at a loss for words and unsure what was supposed to happen next. He looked sympathetically at Tay, knowing how he was suffering right now. Walker spoke next. “Scott, I want you to know that we consider what Tay did a very serious offense. When Tay mentioned earlier that he got in the worst trouble of his life a few days after taking your journal he wasn’t kidding.” “Oh god”, Tay thought, “here it comes.” He cringed as his father continued. “So bad in fact that he got something he’d never gotten before – something I’d used only one other time ever on any of my kids.” Walker glanced at Ike who colored a deep red. “Tell him what that was Tay,” his father ordered. Tay winced as he remembered that horrible day. He shifted and fidgeted, wringing his hands fearfully, eyes glued to the floor. “I got spanked with a belt,” he managed to choke out.

“Well Tay, guess what,” his fathered stated firmly. Tay looked up in a panic to see his father begin to unbuckle his belt. Tears welled up and his heart began to pound once again. He could feel the discomfort and tension coming from everyone in the room. He wanted to beg his father not to do this, but deep down he knew he deserved it, and he resolved then and there to take whatever his father felt was warranted. He wanted to feel absolved of this guilt and shame and if that’s what it would take, then so be it. His body, however, wasn’t necessarily responding so wisely. He was trembling and ready to burst into tears and he hadn’t even felt the first smack yet.

His father reached behind him and pulled the dreaded hairbrush out of his back pocket. Tay shuddered. Walker took a seat on the chair he’d strategically placed front and center in the room, laying the belt across his lap and the hairbrush on the table next to him. He pulled Tay toward him and began to unfasten his pants. When the punishment was going to be especially harsh the boys were never allowed to take their own pants down. This was intended to add to the extreme humiliation of the whole horrible event – and it did. Tay just shut his eyes and tried to pretend this wasn’t really happening. He felt his whole body jerk as his father yanked his pants down his legs. Then his father took him by the wrist and turned Tay over his knee.

As his dad peeled his underpants down in the back, Tay gritted his teeth, squeezed his eyes tight shut, and gripped the bottom rung of the chair hard with both hands to steady himself. He heard a muttering of surprise and sympathy from the group as his still pink backside was exposed. Before he could even form another thought, however, his whole body was jerked powerfully forward by the impact of the hairbrush on his still stinging bare bottom. “Ooohhh” he groaned, then immediately pressed his lips tight together, determined not to make a scene. The next smack was even harder, though, and forced a whimper out of him. The stress of the whole day took its toll then and despite his resolve he broke down. After several more scorching spanks he was moaning loudly and crying openly.

His father whaled on his poor bottom with the hairbrush until it felt like his backside was smoking. He was relentless and seemingly tireless in his task. It was clear to all present that he intended to teach his son a very hard lesson. He spanked Taylor over and over with the hairbrush, covering every inch of his bottom with blistering blows. Tay fought hard not to resist his father or struggle against him. He squirmed and twitched and kicked but he didn’t try to get up or to cover his bottom to protect it. It took all is strength not to do this. “Oh god,” Tay thought through his pain. “How much longer is he going to keep spanking me?” Then he was struck with an awful realization. “He hasn’t even used the belt yet!”

After a couple minutes, although it seemed like a life-time to Tay, his father landed the last spank with the hairbrush. “Now that I have gotten your bottom good and ready,” he stated, “I’m going to finish your spanking off with the belt. You are going to get 30 spanks – one for every day you lied with your silence.” Everyone in the whole room gasped in shock at this sentence. Tay was so distraught he could barely comprehend it all. His father folded the belt in half, raised it up and spanked Tay’s bottom hard with it. “Please Daddy, nooooo,” he wailed. “Oh god, it hurts so bad. Pleeeaase I… I.” But his father was determined to teach Tay this lesson and he didn’t stop or even lessen the intensity of the smacks at all. By the end Tay was bawling so hard he was gasping and panting just trying to catch his breath.

When the 30 agonizing blows were completed and his father decided his beautiful son had finally had enough, he dropped the belt on the floor and carefully and gently pulled Tay’s underwear back up over his throbbing bottom. Tay just lay there sobbing over his father’s knees as his dad tenderly stroked his back and waited for him to calm down and get himself together. When he could finally manage to move, instead of standing up, Tay simply slid backwards off his father’s thighs, kneeling there beside him with his face buried in his father’s lap, crying softly. His father ran his hands through Tay’s damp hair and whispered lovingly, “It’s okay son, the worst is over now.”

After a few moments, Tay sniffled and nodded, then pushed himself painfully to his feet, very gingerly pulling his pants up over his burning backside. He wiped his face and nose with the back of his hands and forced himself to look up and meet first his father’s eyes, and then Scott’s. The look of pity on Scott’s face was almost too much to bear.

His father stood up and gathered Tay into a huge, powerful hug. When he released him he lowered the final boom. “Taylor, you are grounded for one month,” he stated. Tay felt as though he’d been punched in the gut. One month – that was twice as long as he, or any one else in the family for that matter, had ever been grounded. And being grounded in their house wasn’t the same thing as most people would think it was. Sure, you were restricted to the house and had all your privileges revoked, but in addition, his parents added lots of additional chores and school assignments, and, more importantly, you were under a sort of probation, meaning you were spanked for every single minor infraction of any rule – things that would normally only get you a scolding. It was quite a severe sentence. Tay looked like he might just wilt. His father wasn’t cruel though, so he added, “However, for every day that you get through without any disobeying or misbehaving, I will take 2 days off the other end. So you and you alone can seriously reduce the length of this punishment simply by behaving yourself. Is that understood?” “Yes, sir,” Taylor answered meekly. “Okay, you are to go to your room now and stand in the corner until I tell you otherwise. And you are to think long and hard about how you intend to make better choices in the future. Got it?” “Yes, sir,” Taylor muttered, and then he turned and left the room, desperate to get out of everyone’s sight and be alone with his pain.

Tay did as he was told. He stood ashamed and alone in his room facing the corner and thought, once again, about what he’d done – and how he would definitely act differently the next time if ever faced with those same choices again. After awhile, though, he let his mind wander to another event of the day – a much more pleasant one. He allowed himself to relive all the new and amazing things that make-up assistant and he had done in a back room at the studio. That certainly took his mind off his pain and humiliation from what his mother and father had done to him.

Twenty minutes or so later the door to his room opened slightly. Fully expecting to see his Dad, Tay turned nervously. He was deeply embarrassed to find Scott standing there, seeing him standing in the corner like a naughty little boy. He felt his face redden and turned quickly away. “Your Dad was gonna come and tell you that you could come out now, but I asked him if I could do it instead. Can I come in?” Scott asked worriedly. Tay just nodded. He wasn’t ready to face Scott yet, but apparently he had no choice. “Might as well get it over with,” he thought. “No time like the present.”

To his surprise, Scott started to cry. He revealed to Tay that his father had punished him much the same way when he was younger, and that Tay shouldn’t feel at all embarrassed about it in front of him. He told Tay that he hugely admired and respected him – truth be told, was even a bit jealous of him and his amazing talents, and that he was truly impressed with the way Tay had handled that obviously horrible scene. He forgave him completely and apologized himself for having in any way contributed to the situation. He said he hoped Tay would not hold it against him because he considered him a good friend and hoped he felt the same. Tay was stunned and deeply honored and gave Scott a huge hug. Then he pulled himself together and headed out into the living room to begin making amends with the rest of the gathered group. He would start with his mom.